In Satsang, you are working on this issue of your Impersonal Reality. This is your Divine Reality. Your entire history revolves around a pattern of conditioning, and that is your imprisonment. The thought revolves inside your head around an imaginary character, who you believe you are. It is this imaginary character that is attached to these elements of its own imagination, which are the external achievements, educational background, family, relationships ... You have been mistaking yourself for the imprisonment of this “me” that you believe you are. That is your dilemma, your drama, your problem, your fear, and you are protecting them. Notice what I am saying, the gravity of this thing: you are protecting this imaginary character you believe you are.
The interesting thing is that everyone expects you to remain that way, because that will not endanger his or her imagination about him or herself; it will not create any discomfort. In other words, you live the illusion, and illusion gets “comfortable” with you. So, the other accepts you in this game of acceptance and rejection. You are a fraud, because "you" are not Yourself. In the mind, your behavior always fits this model. So, you are always ceding, selling yourself out.
Why do you do that? Because you do not want to be alone; you do not want to take a trail, when everybody is on a road. You do not want to take a trail, because there is almost no one in it, and if there are some, they are so far apart from each other that it is like they would not even exist. They do not give to you any internal, psychological support, any recognition, no "slap on the back," or any congratulations. We are speaking, here, about this Natural and Impersonal State of Being.
How is this impersonal Natural State of Being possible, if there are so many people on this road, all interacting on the same level, speaking the same language, communicating in the same way? Envy, desire and jealousy are commonplace, as well as the protection of this self-image, and everyone is speaking the same language, living in the same way. Therefore, how could you get out of the road and take a trail to be alone? In the ego, you are very afraid that things do not come to you, and since everything only comes to fulfill you, being fulfilled means, exactly, being “at home” on a road common to all.
Even so, you come to Satsang, trying to figure out the real path to Happiness, to Peace, to Wisdom, to Freedom ... One day, Christ said that this track, in His language, was a narrow path, like going through a narrow gate. You left the common road and get the trail. My job here is just to say, "Stay there!" The pressure on the outside is very large, so I enter this space, in that room, and I say, "Stay there!"
Who here feels that is loved? Does your husband love you? Does your wife love you? Do you feel you are loved because he or she is taking care of you? Do you feel you are loved when someone wants to know with whom and for how long you have talked on the phone, or with whom you have been, and why it took so long to get home?
Participant I: Ah! Deep down, I think we like it. We feel important, appreciated...
Master Gualberto: That you are loved...
Participant I: Yes. I could say yes... special!
Participant II: Deep down, it brings a certain pleasure, because we normally say like this: "Ah! He misses me!"
Participant III: There are people who say that if a person is not jealous, it means that he or she does not like us. We think that this is love. We have this preconceived idea that this kind of stuff comes with love. But deep down, we are not interested in Love; we are interested in being importante some how.
Master Gualberto: How is it to feel you are loved by an image that represents possession, control, domain, desire, neediness, fear of losing, anguish? How do you feel being loved by "someone" who represents all this? How is it? Is it good?
So, this road is an ordinary road, everyone is very comfortable in it, and this is acknowledged as something very natural. So, your freedom to say "no" to it, whether by speaking, by silence or by attitudes, will be interpreted as lack of love, insensitivity, indifference – that is one side. The other side is that you also feel fulfilled, as it has been said. You have pleasure in that, because that is also within you, isn’t it? If the other does the same thing, you will feel the same ("Who were you with?"; "Who were you talking to?"). Inside you, there is a very strong need to know what the other is thinking, feeling, if he is missing "you." Do you see the whole game? You do not understand, do you? You have been addicted to this model for a long time...
* Originally published in Portuguese on July 2, 2018 ** Transcribed from a speech in a face-to-face meeting in Cabedelo - PB - Intermares Beach, Brazil