Have we ever investigated this? Have we ever really approached this to, for example, investigate this issue of anxiety and fear, this so-called social anxiety? Why is there always some level of fear, shyness, insecurity in our relationships? The truth about this is that, psychologically, we are functioning based on a mental representation of who we are and who he or she is to me.
The great truth about this is that you and this mental representation, which is this self-image, are very intimate. We can say this very clearly here, and when investigated, this will be clearly comprehended, the fact that you are the self-image. Only when there is the end of the self-image, we have the end of this condition, of this internal psychological condition; it takes place within us, and as everything that we are internally expresses itself, within our relations this form of fear is present, this form of social withdrawal, of social interaction withdrawal.
Our internal condition in this sense of the person, in this sense of the "me," of the "I," is one of suffering. Comprehending the truth about ourselves is going beyond this psychological condition of egoic conditioning, of mental conditioning. And that is what we are here for with you, investigating, deepening this comprehension. The element that creates this entire internal condition of contradiction, of conflict, of disorder and, naturally, of suffering within us is the presence of thought.
It is the thoughts present in you that are telling you things about who the other person is, about who you are, and about what life represents. You would not have the slightest chance of recognizing me without having seen me before, you would not have the slightest chance of knowing my name if I had not told you. When you meet someone, at that moment, you register the image, their face, and you also register their name; this is now part of your memory, part of your remembrance - you have a mental representation of them, they have a mental representation of you. When you meet each other, this encounter is not a meeting separate from the image you have of them and that they have of you; there is no separation between these images, they meet each other.
Is there a way to get closer to the other person without the psychological image of him or her? Yes, we need the image of their face, the remembrance of their name, but here I am referring to the psychological image that I have of him, of her. In our interactions with people, what we have done, and we have done this because of the presence of a lack of attention to our experiences... It is in this lack of attention to our experiences that we cultivate pleasure and pain in them.
In all relationships we have pleasant moments and also bad ones, moments of pleasure and moments of pain, and we are constantly recording all of this for future contacts. In these future contacts, in these new contacts, we are always bringing this past experience into these relations. When you meet someone, they are never the same person, they have already changed - you have already changed and they have already changed. But when you meet each other, you meet based on the experience you have stored of each other. In this contact, we are faced with a mistake, an illusory relation. I have called this illusory relation a relationship.
You have been with someone for five, fifteen or twenty years, your certainty is that you know him or her. In fact, what you have of him or her are all of these experiences stored within you, in this self-image that you have of yourself. This accumulation of images that you have of them is based on this self-image, which is the image that you have of who you are. When you meet him or her, your response is the response of the past. This is how our contacts are, this is how our relations are, which, in reality, does not represent the truth of the relation, it represents the truth of the relationship between images, between beliefs, in this liking and disliking, in this wanting and not wanting. So, the presence of fear, contradiction, conflict and suffering in this interaction is inevitable.
This is how we go about our days, living an entire life alongside someone without knowing, without knowing them, because we do not know ourselves either. If you don't know the truth about yourself, you won't free yourself from this self-image either - the image you've built about who you believe you are. When someone upsets you, they're upsetting the image; when someone makes you sad, they're saddening the image; when someone compliments you, they're complimenting the image. And the only thing you have about who you are is this self-image. This is the condition of ignorance in which we live in the ego, as people.
Is it possible to discover a life free from this self-image? What will life be like free from the ego, free from the "I," free from this "me"? This requires looking at what's happening to us right now, at this moment. It requires a deep comprehension of our reactions when we're challenged to respond based on this memory, this remembrance, this image. Then, yes, we can free ourselves from anxiety, we can free ourselves from fear.
A contact with the other, when it's real, in the truth of the relation - not in the relationship, but in the truth of the relation - there is no fear. So, this social anxiety no longer exists when you comprehend the Truth about yourself, when you free yourself from this mental representation that you carry of others, that you carry of life, that you carry of yourself, the idea of ??someone. It is the presence of this idea of ??being someone, it is the way in which thought is establishing in you this mental construct that is sustaining fear. It is something typical of the ego, it is something typical of the "I."
We need to approach life without the past, without these memories and remembrances of everything we have lived with him or her, so that we can, in fact, have contact with him or her without the image of him or her, as well as of ourselves. This is Liberation in this life, this is the end of self-image, this is the end of the "I," this is the end of the ego. The question is: how does this become possible? By having a comprehension of what thought is, what place thought has in your life and what place it should not occupy. It cannot occupy this space, which is the space of stillness, which is the space of silence, the space where the mind is free from the past, from this continuation of repetition of psychological thought pattern.
It is this psychological thought that we need to free ourselves from. Then, there will be a space of stillness, of silence. A space opens up in you for this vision of life as it happens here and now, in this instant, without the past. As long as we are carrying this mind trapped in this old pattern of repetition of thought, of continuation of thought, of occupation with thoughts, we will be cultivating this self-image, sustaining this image that I have of him or her. This happens because we do not know how to look at thought.
What is the truth about thought? What is thought? Thought is this memory that comes from the past. When you learn to deal with him or her, bringing Attention, at that moment, to thought when it arises, the feeling when it appears, whatever is arising in that contact, when this is seen from that look in Attention - Attention is the presence of a look free from the past -, when we look and in that look there is only the presence of the look, without that identity in the look, which comes from the past, there is no record, there is no image, there is no continuity of that pattern of psychological thought within relation.
We do not know how to look without the "I," look without the ego, look without self-image. We need to discover how this happens, how this, at that moment, becomes possible, and it becomes possible when you discover what it is to look, just to look. The thing is that we are constantly looking to agree or disagree, to like or dislike. When someone compliments you, at that moment, who does it affect? This self-image! So, at that moment, this "I," this ego, this self-image feels flattered; but when it is criticized, it also feels touched by irritation, anger, frustration, revolt. This is the presence of fear, this is the presence of anxiety.
When you bring Attention at this instant to look, in this moment, in this gaze, this sense of observer disappears, this experiencer disappears, this thinker disappears, this self-image disappears; and this requires the presence of Self-awareness, this gaze free from the "I," free from this "me," free from the past. Therefore, we need to learn the truth of this approach to this instant, this present moment, without conclusions, evaluations, imaginations, ideas about what this moment represents, about who he is, about who she is, about who I am. This requires a quiet, silent brain, a mind free of thoughts, evaluations, comparisons, and judgments.
The fundamental element that makes this vision of Self-awareness possible is the presence of this Attention on how the mind is happening here and now, for each of us. This is what we are here, with you, deepening, working on. A life free from the past is a life free from the model of psychological thought, from this form of thought that constructs this identity, that constructs this self-image, which is this sense of the present "I." Therefore, in our meetings here, we are, with you, becoming aware of this, how to bring to this moment the presence of this Attention, this Full Attention to our reactions, to go beyond this self-image, to the direct comprehension of life here and now, free from the "I," free from this "me," free from this person.
Here, in these online meetings on our weekends - we have two days together: Saturday and Sunday - we are, with you, delving deeper into this subject. Here, in the video description, you can find our WhatsApp link to participate in these online meetings on the weekends. In addition to these meetings, we have in-person meetings and also retreats. If this is something that makes sense to you, here is an invitation. Leave your "like," subscribe to the channel and leave here in the comments: "Yes, that makes sense." Ok? And we'll see you. Thanks for the meeting and see you soon!