Very good! There is an issue that I want to consider in the next few minutes, and that is the issue of ego. Some say, “Ego is your enemy.” But whose enemy? By using these expressions, we want to imply that there is “that” that we are and there is this element which is the ego, so there is “I” and the ego. What will be the truth about it? Let’s investigate this a little bit here with you.
When we say, “The ego is my enemy,” the question is, whose enemy? Your answer will naturally be: “For me, the ego is my enemy, so it is my enemy.” It is as if there are two: the “I” – this “me” – and the ego. But the truth is: what is the ego? In answer to that question, we have the truth, and I want to look at it with you, in this meeting. The ego is simply a false center around which our life is happening. So, when we use the expressions “my life” or “our life,” we are talking about a life, which revolves around a center which is illusory, which is false, which is “me”. That “I” is the “me,” the ego. So, whose enemy is this “I,” this “me,” this ego if all we have here and now, in this moment, is the sense of “I"? If the sense of “I” is what is present, if the sense of separation is present. This sense of separation is in conflict with itself, with itself, as the “I” and the “not I,” it is creating the illusion of the sense of separation. So, the sense of a present “I” is the one that separates itself, yes, in this illusion “I” and “not I” of the world, “I” and the “not I” of thought.
The ego, if investigated, will clearly be understood as an illusion. The ego is just a false center, it’s like there’s a wheel, and you know: a wheel has a central point they call axis. All the force applied to that axis will determine the force of that wheel, the speed of that wheel, the movement, the power of movement of that wheel. So, all the power of wheel movement is applied there, on that axis. The axis is the center. The ego is a kind of center around which our life is happening.
So, this “our life” is the particular life of that center, that false center, which is the “I,” the ego. Our life has been made up of problems, we have countless problems. These innumerable problems only exist, have reality, are sustained, have truth in this center, in this false center, in that false axis of this illusory wheel. This illusory wheel is the whole sense of movement of separate existence. This sense of separate existence consists of numerous problems. All the problems in your life are present because of “your life,” that is, that particular life where all this happens from that center, that illusory center, that false center. So, when people say, “Ego is my enemy” or “Ego is your enemy,” what do they mean by ego? The illusion here is that there is “I and an enemy,” which is the ego. This is real? What is the reality of the ego? So, the question is: who am I?
There is no such “enemy” and such “I.” When we refer to ourselves as “I,” we are referring to this “me,” this center, this axis around which life is happening, the particular life of each one of us. This is the sense of the present “I.” So, our life is really complex, it’s really problematic, it’s really lacking in Truth, Beauty, Love, Peace, Happiness because of that “I.” This “I” is our unreal identity.
When we investigate the nature of the “I,” and this is possible through self-investigation, a direct approach through Self-awareness, this puts you in direct contact with the Reality of your Being. Self-observation shows you that what acts, works, operates, moves in our private lives today is a set of remembrances, memories, experiences, knowledge, ideas, judgments, opinions, desires, and fears. It is in this that the “I” is constituted, this “me”, this ego. The observation of the movement of this “I” dissolves this illusion, which is the illusion of this false center, this false illusory “I” with which we have always been confused.
So, it’s not about you having an enemy. You are the only enemy, the present sense of “I” is the only enemy, the only adversary. Opponent of “somebody”? No! It’s just the adversary in the sense of resisting life, Real Life as It’s happening, right here. So, when people use the expression “the ego is your enemy,” it’s because they feel uncomfortable with the presence of the ego in their lives. But the ego itself is their life. Thus, wanting to get rid of this enemy is an illusion, because it is the “enemy” itself, it is the “I” itself, disguising itself as a policeman to arrest the thief. So, it is the “I” that speaks of an enemy outside of itself, apart from it. That very “I” calls this “enemy” as ego, but that “I” is the ego itself, that “I” is the enemy itself.
See how important it is for us to understand this. People want to get rid of fear, they want to get rid of envy, jealousy, “their” attachments, but they are these attachments, these different forms of jealousy, fears, these different fears are them. So, the “I” wants to get rid of fear, but the “I” is the fear. The “I” wants to get rid of jealousy, but the “I” is jealousy. The “I” wants to get rid of envy, but the “I” is envy. The idea one has, created by the “I” itself, is that there is something in us that is not that “I,” but that is the very image that the “I” creates of itself, so it separates itself ideologically and idealizes a liberation which, in fact, never comes true. I repeat: It is the thief who disguises itself as a policeman to arrest the thief.
So, you see: the ego is not your enemy. You are the “I,” the ego, and that is the only enemy present. It is not the enemy of “someone,” it is the enemy of Life as It shows itself, here and now. When that “I” is not there, when that ego is not there, there is no conflict, no dilemma, no problem. The Reality of your Being is the Reality of God. Do not idealize your Being, do not project an image, an idea about God, because this idea about God, this idealization about your Being, will be just another imagination of the “I,” which is this illusory sense of “someone” present here separating itself from Life.
So, it is very interesting for us to observe this. We have many theories about God, many theories about Truth, many theories about Liberation, about love, about peace, about happiness, but they are theories woven by the “I” itself, by this illusion. Therefore, none of these theories are in line with Reality, in line with the Truth about Being, about God, about Happiness, about Love, about Peace. If we are working here on this thing of an approach of the Truth of Being or the Truth of God, we need to start with what we present ourselves to be, here and now. What do we present ourselves to be, here and now? That’s what we have to work with. If there is fear, that’s what we have now, here; if there is envy, that’s what we have now, here; jealousy, that’s what we have; violence, that’s what we have; desire, that’s what we have... So, all these peculiarities of this false center are present here and now, and we need to approach it, looking at it without an ideal of something different, because this is what we have here and now. If that’s what we have here and now, this is what we are here and now. It is what we are here and now that needs to be seen. We cannot work with “someone” from the past or “someone” from the future, it’s only “someone” here and now. So, this idea of doing something tomorrow or getting rid of something from yesterday has no reality.
What is the real way to approach this false center, this enemy, which is the ego? Looking at what we are, here and now, investigating the nature of the “I,” observing all this internal movement of memories, remembrances, images, of liking, not liking, appreciating, not appreciating. When you look at this movement of the “I,” present here and now, without any resistance to this movement, you can now see in yourself envy, jealousy, fear, and desire. And to see this in yourself is to see this “yourself” as being this. If you don't have an idea about it, an image about it, an intellectual, ideological concept about it, if what you have here and now is what is shown itself, that sensation, that emotion, that feeling, when you don't separate yourself from that, what happens to that energy? What happens to fear, this energy in the body, in the nervous system, in this mechanism, in this organism? What happens to this movement called “fear” when it doesn't find the thought, the image, the idea to do something? What happens to this energy that is now present here in the body? First thing: it loses the value of the name. It’s a discomfort, it’s a malaise, it’s a kind of pain, it’s a kind of suffering, but it doesn't have a name. You no longer name that experience, and you, too, no longer pose as the “I” that wants to get rid of the experience. So, this separation between fear, which is the experience that now no longer has a name, it’s just this sensation, this feeling, this pain; you don't put the name anymore, you don't classify, you don't name. It is something that is present now, here, in the body, in this mechanism, in this organism. That is the experience, but now there is no experiencer anymore, there is no “me” wanting to get rid of it, wanting to do something against it, wanting to get rid of it. There isn’t a thought about it, an image about it, an idea of something in the future, which is ideological liberation, the idea of being free from fear. No! In that moment, there is only contact with experience, contact with experience without the “I,” without that background that rejects, that wants to get rid of it, that wants to separate itself from it, that wants to run away from it.
This escape movement is very common. We live running away from these states of the “me,” the “I,” the ego, so we run away. This is a very important subject here, a very delicate one. We escape to drink, to drugs, to different forms of entertainment, we escape to sex, we escape to religious beliefs, we escape to reading books, it brings us emotional comfort, it gives us hope. And what is hope? An idea, a concept, a belief, in tomorrow, a belief in the future and, of course, when that is present, it distances us from that pain, that discomfort. But this distance is not the end of it, it is something temporary. So, because of all the running away, over the years we've gotten a lot of practice in running away. Each one has a specific form of escape that he likes the most, and that distances us from this pain, this discomfort that can have different names. It distances us, temporarily, from this experience of the “I” suffering, because now it is the “I” taking on another form, it flees from pain for pleasure.
So, this is how we are dealing with this false center, with this “me,” with this “I,” with this ego. The egoic mind, the false center, is always in contradiction, in conflict, in some kind of suffering, and we do that all the time. We are always**escaping this discomfort, escaping this pain, escaping this suffering, temporarily replacing it with some form of escape. So we are always running away from these psychological pains. Fear is pain, guilt is pain, anxiety is pain, depression is pain, we name it, and when we name it, we classify it, explain the feeling to ourselves, explain the feeling to others and we remain stuck in this model of this “me,” this “I,” this ego. We temporarily escaped, but we're back right away. Soon after, again, we are back.
So that complexity which is the “me,” the “I,” the ego, that false center, is the enemy. So the ego is the enemy, but it is not the enemy, I repeat, of “somebody,” it is somebody. You are when you're being fear, you are when you're being anxiety, you are when you're being depression. So it’s not “I and depression,” “I and fear,” “I and anxiety.” I am that if I discover how to assume that without running away, without escaping, without ideologically distancing myself. But if I look at these feelings, emotions, sensations, what happens? Since childhood, we were educated to escape, to escape pain, psychological pain, emotional pain. Then
we never learned to deal with fear, with anguish, with sadness, with states of anxiety, we never learned to deal with it, because we were always running away from it. We never get close to see, to make sense of a present “I” rejecting, struggling, resisting this experience that is unfolding. So, the experience shows itself, this resistance shows itself now as this pain. We never learn to deal with the experience of the present moment, which is Life as It happens, without this resistance. So the sense of “I” is always there resisting and therefore suffering. Do you understand that? It is always the sense of an “I” present in resistance to Life as It shows itself, as It is happening, which sustains this sense of “someone” with these internal patterns of unhappiness and suffering. And then we idealize this “I” free of these patterns, but this “I” is the pattern itself. OK?
This is the subject that we have been investigating here on the channel with you: the real possibility of going beyond the “me,” the “I,” the ego, this false center, this false ego, this false identity around which our egoic life is happening. Enlightenment or Awakening is the happening of Something new, it is the Reality of your Being freed from the sense of “I,” from the ego, from that false center. This is Happiness, This is Love, This is Peace, This is Consciousness of God, in this absence of the “I,” of this ego, of this false center.
If this is something that makes sense to you, here is the invitation, leave your like, subscribe to the channel. I want to remind you: we have online meetings, face-to-face meetings and also retreats where we are working with you. And here is the invitation and we'll see you in the next one. OK?
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