We have some very curious behaviors. One of them is how to deal, notice, how to deal with wounded ego. The person asks a question like this. The idea a person has is that they can learn to deal with someone else's ego when one is hurt, offended, upset, annoyed or injured in some way. So, we want to discover how to deal with others when they are in the ego, when they are entirely identified with the ego.
So, notice where we started from. Notice the confusion present within each of us. In life, in our relationships, what is present in these relationship contacts are relationships that are based on ideas, pictures, photographs, images that one has of the other. But when looking at the other person, it seems that the other person's ego is offended, wounded, hurt, annoyed, upset, and we want to learn how to deal with that. We want to reach a good agreement, a good negotiation. But who are we within this relationship, if not also another self-image?
So, he has an image about who he is, about who he believes himself to be, and he's upset, but we have an image about who we are, about who we believe ourselves to be, and this belief of being someone better or being well, better than him or her, I can help him, if I learn how to do it. Who is this “I?” A self-image, also. Just a self-image that is also offended, hurt, saddened, annoyed, upset. Notice this.
Thus, our relationships are relationships that occur between images. Relationships between images are encounters between thoughts. Since the image you have of who you are is a set of memories, remembrances, recollections, thoughts. Then, the one who “I” am meets you as you are. But as you are and as “I” am, this is a meeting between thoughts. Thoughts come from the past. Let's calmly follow this here.
You do not have a single thought that is not the result of the past. Therefore, you have no idea about yourself that does not come from the past and no idea about others that does not come from the past. So, a meeting like this we call a relation. Here what we are having is a relationship. There is no real relation or this relationship is a relationship between images, which are thoughts, that come from the past.
Notice how we function psychologically. Note that this is fundamental for Liberation, in this life, of this condition of egocentrism, of ego-identity, of imprisonment in this illusion of separation between you and life, between you and God, naturally, between you and the other, because what we have are thoughts meeting, images negotiating. This is what we call life, relationships.
Is it possible to have a real life? Since this life, as we call it, notice, is something that is within the context of the movement of this consciousness common to all, which is the consciousness of the “I,” which is the consciousness of the ego, which is this self-image having consciousness. We call consciousness the presence of this self-image in recognition. We use expressions and never investigate what we are saying.
When you say you are conscious or when you say “I have consciousness,” what are you saying? What you are saying, in fact, is that there is a movement of thought recognized there. This is what we call consciousness. You are always aware of what you remember, what you recall. You go through experiences, you keep these experiences as memory, you have remembrance, recollection and you call it consciousness. Are we together?
“I am aware of who I am.” What truth is there? The only truth is that all thought has about who it is, is the image it makes of itself. That is not the Truth of Consciousness, it is being conscious. In this being conscious, there is the present thought and the idea of a conscious being behind memory, remembrance, thought. And now we are seeing that this is not true, because this thought is nothing other than this conscious being.
See how simple this is, and this is something that always escapes from us. We are not aware of this unconsciousness that is living in this movement of thought, thought recognizing itself, and we are calling this consciousness. All right? How can we be aware of all this? Self-awareness.
What you comprehend, you are free. If you don't comprehend, you are not free. If you comprehend fear, that is the end of fear. If you comprehend envy, that is the end of envy; of jealousy, the end of jealousy. So, when people wonder how to deal with a wounded ego, they first need to understand how the ego works. But it's not the other person's ego, it's your own ego. Because we see the ego in others, but who is this person who is seeing the ego in others?
The Awakening of Real Consciousness is the Truth of Revelation that this sense of “I,” of ego, present, this “me,” is an illusion. So, it's not about how to deal with someone else's wounded ego. It's about becoming aware of the illusion of this state of isolationism, of separateness, of egocentrism, of self-interest, of the illusion that I make about this “I” that I am, that I believe I am, here.
Now we come to another question. How can we deal with this? Having a direct view of how to meditate correctly. Notice, now we have the answer here to a question that is asked: “How to meditate correctly?” You see, Meditation is not a tool that you use to find peace, stillness, silence, relaxation, and tranquility.
People have used or have tried to use meditation as a tool for stress, for anxiety, for anguish, to deal with some phobias. So, they ended up studying meditation techniques, meditation practices, for this purpose. Here, when we talk or use the term Meditation, we are talking about something else. We are talking about an encounter with the Truth of Silence, but a Silence of a quality totally different from the quality of silence that someone achieves through a meditative technique or practice.
You can silence the mind, quiet the mind, find a certain silence. In fact, you will find yourself in a state of stupor, of trance when you perform a technique. You learn to breathe, chant a mantra, sit cross-legged. Here, we are dealing with you about the Truth of Meditation, Meditation that reveals Silence. But it is not a silence that you find through a technique, through a practice. It is not the silence that reveals itself when you force the brain, through a stillness model, technique or practice, to quiet down.
Here it is a Silence that arises naturally when the sense of “I,” of the ego, is not present. So, yes, the brain is still, the mind is still, Silence is present, and there is Something, here and now, present revealing itself, beyond the known: it is the Reality of your Being, it is the Reality of God.
However, understand: this only becomes possible when, first, we learn to have an approach to Self-awareness. Without Self-awareness... And this Self-awareness is looking, seeing, perceiving, in a new way, whatever is happening here, because the element, which is the “I,” the ego, is not present. So, what is Self-awareness? It is a direct approach of what is here, without this element that separates itself to do something with what is shown here.
So, let 's go. What is the basis for Self-awareness? Self-observation, learning the art of looking at thoughts, feelings, emotions, a sensation that arises in that moment, a perception of that moment. This happens on a daily basis, moment by moment. Not at specific times of the day, but as you walk, talk to someone, deal with a given thing.
To bring consciousness to that moment, become aware of each and every psychological reaction, as well as physical one: your gestures, your tone of voice, your language, your words, whatever you are present in that moment, being seen. It is not to alter, change, modify, adjust, fix, or do anything with what is being seen. It is seeing, and this is seen without someone seeing it. So, the internal movement of the “I,” of the ego, this movement that comes from the past, that always reacts from within, does not enter.
To look at what is present here at this moment, without a thought, an intention, a reason, a desire, just look, become aware of that moment, what it is that you are emerging at that moment. Thus, there comes the Truth of self-observation, which is the revelation of Self-awareness, because everything that is shown here is seen without the sense of someone doing something with it.
So, at this moment, there is a real approach to awareness of Meditation. The mind becomes silent, the brain quiets, the sense of “I,” of this “me,” which sustains this duality, all of this falls apart here, in this instant. So, we are faced with the Revelation of Life as it is, as it happens.
So, how to meditate correctly? Becoming aware of what is present here. So, in this contact with the husband, a look free from the image; with your wife, a look free from the image you have of her. You do not, now, have any image of the person you are dealing with. At this moment, we are faced with a real relationship and not an image-centered relationship. So, we don't have a clash between thoughts.
Try this: look as if for the first time. You will realize that this is not easy at all, because the old movement of the “I,” of the ego, which is the movement of this self-image, always comes up. This requires the presence of Attention. See, it's not an effort to be attentive, it's a simple, natural interest, to look without the image, without the past, without bringing back this internal movement, which is the movement of the “I,” of the ego. In that instant, you eliminate self-image. Free from that self-image, you are free from the image you make of him or her, or the world around you.
So, Meditation is something that is here, in this moment, when the “I” is not there, self-image is not there, the ego is not there, this whole movement of egoic consciousness has lost its importance. Can we live life like this, free from this sense of separation? So, at that moment, the wounded ego no longer exists, because the sense of “I,” of the ego, is not present. Free from the illusion of this self-image, you are free in this contact with him or her, also without the image of him or her.
So, this is the answer to the question: “What is Mindfulness?” Mindfulness is the awareness of the Truth of this Being when the mind is not there, when the ego is not there, when the illusion of separation is not present. We are faced with the Reality of Life happening here and now. And in this Mindfulness, this Truth is revealed, which is beyond the known, beyond the mind, beyond the body, beyond this “I,” and this you. Then, there is the Reality of Non-separation, of Non-duality present.
This is our topic here on the channel. We have several videos here, we have several playlists here on the channel, then you can take a look. What it is this contact with True Meditation and the Truth of Self-awareness. And, in addition, we have our other channel called “Marcos Gualberto.” Take a look here, we have the link so you can check out the other channel.
And most importantly: we have online meetings that take place on weekends. Saturday and Sunday, we are together through Silence and in this contact also with questions and answers, delving deeper into these subjects here with you. OK? This occurs on Saturday and Sunday.
We also have face-to-face meetings and retreats. If what you just heard is something that makes sense to you, here's an invitation: leave your “like” here, subscribe to the channel and put it here in the comments: “Yes, it makes sense.” And we'll see each other. Thanks for the meeting and see you soon!
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