GC: Hello everyone! We are here for another videocast. Again, Master Gualberto is here with us. Thank you very much, Master, for this meeting.
Master, today I'm going to read an excerpt from Joel Goldsmith's book called “Invisible Supply.” In this book, Joel talks about love in an excerpt. He says the following: “There are several forms of love: marital love, paternal love, filial love, fraternal love, love for neighbors and the community. Love is a major factor in our existence.” Master, can you tell us what love is?
MG: Very good. What can be described, Gilson, categorized, put into words, can only be described within a model already known to all of us. And this model, already known to all of us, if investigated, we will discover that it is not Real Love. What is the Truth of Love is not within what thought, in us, can identify, within its model of experience.
So, the best way to get closer to the Truth of Love, Real Love, the best way to get closer to It is by investigating what this Love is not. And, of course, these experiences that we have in our relationship with others, experiences that are based, in general, within our relationships, based on pleasure and pain, likes and dislikes, satisfaction and dissatisfaction – this is the level of relationship that we have within our experiences with each other – this cannot be the Truth of Love.
This is based on relationship experiences, which are based on interests we have within relationships. There is only one way to get closer to the Reality of Love: it is by discarding the illusion present within our relationships. Note, Gilson, that our relationships are self-centered relationships, because it is typical, it is the structure and nature of the ego to live in its self-centeredness, and it is interested, in fact, always, in itself! So, the contact we have with each other, if it is a pleasant, enjoyable, satisfying, romantic, sentimental, pleasant contact, we call that love.
We use this word without actually knowing what it means, because our contact with the other, based on the illusion of who we are... Since you don't know who you are, you also don't know who the other is; since you don't know how you, in this “me,” in this ego, behave, your contact with the other is always a contact, in fact, of some form of exploration. But I want to repeat this: if there is satisfaction, fulfillment, gratification, exchange… this sentimental, emotional, romantic thing, we call it love. But the greatest proof that there is no Love in this is that, when this is denied, when the interest of the ego is confronted – and this happens all the time in our relationships – what we call “love” turns into something else.
So, notice how much this “love” we have in our relationships – and that is what we are doing: we have to investigate the illusion of what we call love to then get closer to What Real Love is –, in this relationship we have with each other, in this so-called “love,” it is loaded with suspicion, insecurity, psychological, sentimental, emotional dependence… It is loaded with jealousy, possession, control. So, what we call love is not real: love for the family, love for the nation, love in a closer relationship between husband and wife, between parents and children... All of this needs to be investigated, because as long as there is the sense of ego present within experience, being the center of that experience, Love, Truth will be far away.
What we have is an egoic relationship complicity; this is not Love! Definitely, what we have called love is something heavy, with aggression, violence, and fear. So, here, the first thing is to discover, within ourselves, an internal state free of the sense of “I,” of the ego, in this contact with others, observing our reactions… Realizing this in ourselves! That’s when, yes, Gilson, we have the chance, the divine opportunity, to free ourselves from this center, this ego, this “me,” this “I.”
I have called it the “center” in us, because it is the center of experiences. All the experiences around it are for its gratification, for it to fulfill itself in some way. So, the real way we have, the true way we have of getting closer to the Truth about Love, in our relationships, is by studying ourselves, understanding what goes on inside each one of us: why we say what we say; what is behind this way of looking and thinking about him, about her; how we react to the instant, to the present moment in this contact; to understand how we create images within relationships…
If you hold an image of who I am and I hold an image of who you are – and that is what actually happens in relationships – we do not have the slightest possibility of understanding the presence of Love within that relationship, because my way of approaching you and your way of approaching me will be self-centered, self-interested, full of fear, suspicion, and imagination, because that's what we do.
So, can we access the Truth of Love? Yes, Gilson, when the ego is not there. We are unaware of the beauty of an ego-free encounter. We cannot expect others to meet us without their ego. What we can do is assume the truth of this sense of an identity present here, which is this illusory sense of an “I,” creating problems in these relationships. All we have to do is study ourselves. These relationships are mirrors where we see ourselves, where we find ourselves, where we perceive our fears, our conflicts, our contradictions.
A couple has lived for fifteen years, for twenty years together, but the only encounter they have is an encounter with a certain intimacy at times. Most of the day – or the days they have together – is spent exchanging barbs. Some are subtle and others are very declared, they are the barbs of the ego, and this is present because of images. So, we use expressions like “I love you,” “I like you a lot,” “I can’t live without you,” but all of this is merely sentimental, romantic. We bring flowers, but we also bring our suspicions, our fears. We also bring the conflicts of our internal states of stress, anxiety, fear, and worry into our relationships… And all of this is, in fact, the absence of Love, it is not the presence of Love.
So, by becoming aware of what the absence of Love is, we can discover something outside of that, but as long as we are trying to sustain this psychological condition of being “someone” within a relationship, without paying attention to ourselves, without knowing ourselves, without this vision of Self-Awareness, without having an approach of this Real Silence – which occurs in a very natural way when Meditation is present, when Meditation happens –, without the presence of this Perfume of Meditation in ourselves, in our relationships, we do not have Love, we don't know what Love is. We can live fifty years, sixty years, in a relationship, and all we are – which is what the other is – is conflict, is a veiled form of suffering.
So, we cannot confuse things, Gilson. I am not denying that, in our relationships, we have companionship, we have complicity, we have some sacrifices, we have a search for negotiation, understanding, adjustment, but none of this is Real Love. When Love is present, the ego is not. And there is no such thing as divine love, human love, collective love, love for the country, love for family... There is only Love, and if Love is present, your life has this Perfume, has this Beauty. Everyone who approaches you realizes that there is something different there – it is the Presence of something indescribable, which is the Presence of God's Truth. God is the only Reality, which is Love present when the ego is not. So, it’s not about “I love you,” it’s about the Love present in this Loving. Love present in this Loving is not “I love you.”
So, yes, a life in Love is possible, a relationship with others without the illusion of an identity present within this experience. When Love is present in this experience, we have the Truth of “experiencing the Beauty of Love,” whether with family, with children, with friends… Now, first of all, Gilson, in yourself. If there is the Understanding of this Love there, because there is this Freedom to Be this Only Reality, which is the Reality of God, this Love is shareable, then It is present.
It is not about this search to be loved, this search to love, this intention of wanting to love, this ideal of loving. All of this is in thought, it is in the future, it is in a projection that the ego makes. Love is here and now or It is not! To become aware of what you are, right now, stripping yourself of the illusion of an identity within this experience, in this contact with “him,” with “her,” with life around you... The truth is, when your Being flourishes, the Reality of this Love shows itself. And It doesn’t make a fuss, It doesn’t say “I’m here!”, but It has its Aroma, It has its Presence. So, Love is the only thing that matters in life; in fact, Life is Real when Love is present.
Otherwise, what we have called life is conflict, it is a contradiction, are relationships. Human beings handle this as best they can do. When you are not happy or in an absurd state of unhappiness, you create an idea, a belief of finding this happiness in a new relationship or relationships. This is something completely false, and this is because we lack the Truth of this Being. The Realization of this Being, which is You, is the Realization of this Love that is present, in this moment, as the Presence of Truth is here in this moment, which is the Truth of God. That's it.
GC: Master, within this “relationship” subject, we have a question, here, from Wellington. He asks, exactly within this experience of this Real Meditation, the practice of Presence: “How does this real experience impact relationships? If possible, I would like you to talk about marital relationships, both for those who are single and for those in relationships.”
MG: So, Gilson, we cannot separate one thing from another. We cannot first find Love outside of relationships and then place Love within relationships. The Realization of the Truth of Love present in this encounter, within relationship, is the Truth of Divine Revelation, of God's Revelation. So, how does this work involve our relationships? In fact, this work is simply impossible without our true relationships.
The relationships we have with each other do not suffer a real impact from the Divine Presence, because they are egocentric relationships, relationships centered on the “I.” We do not approach each other by having, in this meeting; seeing, in this meeting; perceiving, in this meeting, the opportunity to have a revelation of our own ego. Our relationships, which are relationships between egos, are actually conflicting, full of suffering, full of problems. As I just put it, there may be a certain appreciation, affection, care, attention, but the ego is unhappy in itself. So, when it meets the other, who is, in fact, “ego” itself, there is the presence of the ego, the ego in conflict!
Becoming aware of yourself, in this contact with others, is working on the Divine Truth, it is working on the Truth of God. It is essential that we discover a life without an image of the other. What are these images we make of him or her? When she pleases me, I like her; When she displeases me, I don't like her. We spend a lot of time in a relationship where, throughout this time, we are the experiencer, cultivating experiences of pleasure and pain in that relationship. These experiences of pleasure and pain from this image that “I” make of him or her and “sustain” this within this relationship. And if this is present, we are under an impact. Not under the impact of Grace, but under the impact of confusion, disorder, suffering, and fear. So, this is the condition of insanity present in our relationships.
Working on yourself is becoming aware of the movement of your own “I,” your own ego, in this contact with him or her. It is not about managing the other, controlling the other, manipulating the other, making the other an object of fulfillment, satisfaction, and desire, as, in the ego, we have done. So, how can we count on the Presence of Grace, on the Presence of Truth in our relationships? How can we count on the Presence of Love in our relationships, if we do not observe what is happening, if we are not aware of what is happening within each one of us, in this contact?
Becoming aware of this requires Self-Awareness, it requires Meditation; Gilson, it requires, above all, the Power of Grace.
I have invited people to participate in these meetings. We need a very powerful element to make this possible. Hearing a speech like this is not enough! You may find it interesting; you may find it beautiful; you may find it really cool. Here, I have invited you to delve into this, to delve deeper into this. These meetings, which are online meetings and in-person meetings, have this purpose.
So, we open ourselves to something mysterious, extraordinary, which is the very Power of the Presence of Grace that is communicated in these encounters, which begins to make this possible in our relationships, because this is something that becomes possible within each of us. From an internal change, our relationships change. This Perfume, this Presence… yes, it brings an extraordinary impact on our lives, when we open ourselves to this Grace, when we open ourselves to this Presence, this Mystery. OK?
GC: Master, it's impressive and revealing: when I had this first contact with the Master in these meetings, exactly the Satsangs, which are these weekend intensives, where the Master shares this vision of what this True Love is... and then, with this Grace that the Master is, somehow an understanding comes up. And it's hilarious how much this “love” of the ego, in these roles it plays in life, is a complete identification with an image: image of a wife, image of a son, image of a patriot, etc. And it is only, really, only in this plunge with the Master that we are able to see the madness this so-called “love” is. This is nothing about Love, it is always an attachment, it is an identification, this self-image. Now, with this Grace, this Silence that the Master shares, it is possible to understand what this Love actually is.
MG: What we call love, Gilson, is feeling, emotion, and sensation. Feeling, emotion, and sensation, notice, are still part of thought. Notice the memories arising within you. These memories are full of feelings, emotions, and sensations… These memories are thoughts. So, when you have a memory of someone you love, what you have is a feeling, an emotion, and a sensation, linked to thought. This cannot be the Reality of Love, but this is what we call love. So, you're telling me you only love who you remember!
See, we link our thoughts to the Truth; thought is not a truth! Thought is just a memory of past experience. If the past experience was pleasurable, rewarding, fulfilling, happy, so the ego calls love the illusion of satisfaction. We don't know, Gilson, what Love is! Love is the absence, exactly, of thought. The presence of Love dispenses with thought! Thought is not necessary for this Love, but it is what we know, it is what we learned in our model of the world, in our model of life.
So, we live within this “love and hate” duality, always based on thoughts. The memory of those who “I” don’t like, of those who “mistreated” me, of those who did “me” harm, is a memory, too, full of feeling, emotion, and sensation. It's a thought! This is all an image! “From this person, I feel hatred or aversion, or I want them far away from me.” This is how this movement of thought is in us, this is how we are working. This model of thought, which is what gives structure to the ego… We need to get rid of it, Gilson. As long as it is present, we will be living this love and this hate, based on memories, remembrances, and thoughts.
And what do we have from people? An illusion! A very private and personal imagination. The image that “I” have about you is not the Truth about You, it is just what thought, here, constructed. This construction, this imagination, is the model that gives formation to this identity that is the “I,” that “I” am. It's all very simple. However, this thing is not simple at all. Becoming aware of this requires an observation approach to how you, internally, work. Wisdom, Gilson, which is this Revelation of your Being, is born when Awakening flourishes, and It flourishes due to Self-Awareness.
So, when there is Self-Awareness, there is Wisdom. With the Presence of Wisdom, we have the Truth of Love revealing itself, of Real Love, because there is an end to this model of thought in which the “I,” the ego, is having its continuity within it. Is this clear?
GC: Perfect! Gratitude, Master! We've come to an end. So, for those of you watching the video: leave a “like,” leave a comment... You can ask questions in the comments that we will address in the next videos. And for those who want to delve deeper into this investigation of what this True Love is, seeing in themselves this falseness of this “love” that the Master reported, here is the invitation to come to face-to-face and online meetings, which are Satsangs. In the video description and in the first pinned comment, there will be a WhatsApp group link for more information about these meetings.
Master, gratitude.
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